Full Bloom

There are no words for how God works.  Beautiful, just, soft, strong, loving...they don't cut it.  The last few months have been really hard for me for different reasons but this morning I realize it all comes down to one thing...I'm not walking in my calling.  God has called me to be His hands and feet in a very specific way but I have been ignoring it.  My heart keeps crying out for peace and some kind of hope but I can't find rest because there is no rest when you are fighting the Creator of all things.

I've been asking myself a lot of questions lately and trying to figure out what has been causing me to ignore God's small whisper.  There are many answers to that question but a few that are very prominent in my life right now.  I surround myself with people...all the time.  Granted, I'm a people person and learn SO much from those I love...but in doing that I forget to allow God to be one of those people in my every day life.  He is the one I want to spend most of my time with.  Another reason I block out His whisper is because I know it's calling me to something intimidating, something I know I can't do on my own.  It's so ridiculous (human) for me to think that anything God would call me to do would be something of my own power...Holy Spirit is my strength and who actually does the moving and changing!  I am but a vessel.   And the oh so prominent one is that I am a people pleaser.  I allow other people and their expectations to become more important than the sweet call of my King.  Loving people and letting them control me are 2 different things.  Changing my "people-pleasing heart" is really hard and something that I've been trying to change for a long time but I do believe that in following my calling I will be taking a giant step in leaving that behind.

Life is changing today and I am excited to really embrace it.  I think my Spring is fully bloomed and now I must work to make room for the good to grow.  

God is so good.